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Unwelcome visitor on holiday !

go Sun is shining, weather is sweet….and my depression decided to come along with me!
An unwanted visitor is something I am sure we can all relate too right?

You see I am not someone who has a sad encounter or who comes across as being depressed. But the truth is l have lived with it for years. Bouts of dark clouds that come and go like changing wind.
I wouldn’t mind as much but holidays are suppose to be carefree, happy times, perfect pictures and happy memories…..that’s the expectation right ?
Hmmmmmm nope ‘sigh’ reality is depression, anxiety can make its appearance anytime and any place!

And I still smile 🙂

A strange way to express myself you may read as in the middle of my anguish I still have hope and a fighting spirit in my wrestling mind.
Don’t get me wrong in some of my lowest points its hard to think clear and positive. But having gone through this train of thought for years, I know this too will soon pass!
For however long it will stay for..I press on forward and upwards and try my best not to sink deeper into this black smog.
I speak of it as a separate entity as even though its been a part of me for years I refuse to live in it, walk in it and breath it.
It doesn’t define me or pave the way for my life…I wont let it!

I am grateful and thankful in a crazy way that my experiences allow me to be real and at times I feel have true empathy for those who live with mental illness too. Albeit mine in comparison to some can not be measured to some of the more serious conditions, it still is something that is a part of me and at times effects my daily life. Its not a choice its not a feeling of being low and upset it goes far deeper….don’t get it twisted as something that can just be shaken off !

follow site I hope to encourage someone, to let someone know they are not alone. So many of us walk this crazy journey believing we are alone. Truth be it most of us could be helping each other more….
If we didn’t feel judged or defined by mental illness.

Just know if you are reading this and have been or are struggling you certainly are not alone.
Here are just 2 ways I help myself and keep focused at these times.

go site Talk and be honest to those you feel can support you and have your back. If you have a close network of family and friends it maybe good to ‘check in’
What I mean is letting them know your having a bad day. Support, care, understanding, hugs and love can mean so much….don’t be afraid.

Writing is a good way to get out what is in your mind. Especially if you find it too hard to talk to someone. Get yourself a special book, keep it in a reachable place. Its a great way to release and free your mind.

And with that if any of you want to leave a comment or any encouraging words future readers may see..please do below. The more we can support and help each other on this rocky road the better.

Peace and love to you all xx
Mrs H

Maureen Hayden

A real and transparent blog following my day to day journey in life. Covering topics as a aesthetician, faith, poetry, mental health and inspiring thoughts and discussions.

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2 Comments

    Michelle Daley

    24th Apr 2019 - 10:04 am

    Thank you for your post!! Hello anxiety your back then 😢the last 3mornigs at 4am you have decided to say hello well I’m sorry but I have to say good bye your draining me. Reading your blog really helped xx

      Maureen Hayden

      25th Apr 2019 - 3:58 am

      So happy my blog helped Michelle. Can completly relate to what your saying. Interupted sleep is something I have faced often enough. Its those times I am often inspired to write poetry and express myself that way …other times…just over think!
      I pray over time your mind will heal.
      Thank you for commenting… Im sure others can relate too. Peace and love

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About Me

A wife, mother to a beautiful daughter, Christian and obsessive skincare and beauty addict…love my family, feel blessed, grateful for life.

Lots of love xx

Mrs H

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